About Neurodiversity

Neurodivergent

Someone who is neurodivergent thinks and functions in ways that diverge from the dominant societal ways (which we sometimes unhelpfully call “normal”).  People who are neurodivergent may have diagnostic labels such as ADHD, autism, anxiety disorders, dyslexia, intellectual disabilities, OCD, Tourette’s Syndrome, epilepsy, PTSD, among others.  Or they might not.  Some neurodivergence is genetic or innate, while other times it is produced by brain-altering events (like trauma).  Also termed “neuro-atypical” or “neuro-minority.” 

 

Neurotypical

Someone who thinks, processes inputs, and functions similar to the majority of the people in the world.  As a whole, they are still neurodiverse (their brains are different), but they don’t regularly struggle to function in typical mainstream ways or have a neurological diagnosis

 

Masking

A common response to talk of neurodivergence is that “it wasn’t a thing when we were kids and everyone got along just fine, so why do we need to make a big deal about it now?”  The truth is that not everyone got along fine.

 

Many neurodivergent people work very hard to avoid being singled out for being different, so they “mask”--they try to look and act like a neurotypical person by suppressing their anxiety, hiding their struggles, and enduring their discomfort.

 

Masking doesn’t change who someone is or make it easier for them to cope, only how they act in front of others.  Expecting someone to mask is not only unfair; it’s exhausting and hurtful.  It comes at a steep cost.  Masking might involve enduring highly uncomfortable situations and sensations, or denying oneself the comforts that help them cope with life, all because their differences make neurotypical people a little uncomfortable.  

 

It might feel a little uncomfortable or unconventional at times, but it’s really not that hard to accept people for who they are.  We trust that when they are free from hiding their true selves, they can be better versions of themselves, and we can be better knowing their true beauty and gifts.  

 

​Behaviors

Many of the negative and disruptive “behaviors” associated with neurodivergent people are not actually symptoms of the differences themselves.  Instead, these behaviors are signs of an unmet need--they are being forced to function in a situation beyond their physical or emotional abilities or denied the tools they need to cope.  

 

Because neurodiversity involves the brain, we assume it’s all in our heads and can be fixed with the right thinking.  However, our brains and bodies are tied together.  None of us are our best selves when we are hungry or tired, we ball our fists when we’re angry, and we are jittery when we’re nervous.  Stress on the mind or body impacts the other and can’t be “fixed” with willpower and positive thoughts alone.  

 

Neurodivergent Adults

Neurodivergent kids grow up.  Some adults are diagnosed later in life or never receive a diagnosis.  Adults are often more self-conscious and likely more adept at masking (though they shouldn’t have to).  

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